A Letter to Our Daughter

Dear Emerson Grace,

This letter comes on the eve of your FIRST birthday. Where has the time gone? It's been a whirlwind of a year with so many joys and challenges. We didn't know quite what we were getting ourselves into when those two lines showed up on the pregnancy test that day in December. We had so much fun watching you grow inside of Mom's belly while you kicked + squirmed (and hiccuped a lot). We got nervous and excited that night you decided you were ready to enter the world. You came on a Tuesday, at 4:38 in the morning. You were nice enough to let Mommy catch up on her Monday night television and you even waited to start your shenanigans until she finished her bowl of Mint Chocolate Chip ice-cream (Daddy is rolling his eyes at this moment). Mommy says "THANK YOU" for that, as it was her last time eating ice-cream for quite a while. You started telling your Mom that you were ready to come out around 9:45pm. You didn't waste any time and by 11pm, Mommy + Daddy were racing to the hospital because your Mommy was in a lot of pain. By 3:00am, you were very ready to be in our arms. You came into our lives with a head full of hair and chubby little cheeks (those are still our favorite feature). We were amazed that we had created such an adorable human being. You were (and still are) the most beautiful baby we'd ever seen! The first few nights with you were exhausting and overwhelming. We weren't sure of a lot of things, but we knew right away that we loved you more than we'd ever loved anyone or anything. You were our miracle.

This year, you have shown us love in the simplest of ways. I (Mom) am starting to cry writing this portion because I just can't believe how quickly a year has passed. I regret not cherishing more moments with you because now they're just a memory. Thankfully, your Daddy and I have taken tons of pictures of you to help us remember special moments of your first year. As I was getting you  ready for bed tonight, I did something I don't normally do; I rocked you. You laid your head on my chest and I just kissed you over and over. I could feel time just slipping away. You are growing so fast and every day presents new opportunities to experience your growth. You are so funny and your smile is just absolutely contagious. You light up when you see your Daddy and you crawl so fast to get to me these days. You love playing Peek-a-boo with Daddy's hat and you are extremely ticklish on your feet and sides, but really only when Daddy tickles you. You hardly cuddle up to us anymore, but when you do, the whole world stops. You don't like being left alone, and you would stay in my arms all day if I'd let you (or if I was strong enough). You are determined, strong-willed, and not afraid to ask for help (especially when you want to do something that scares you). You know sign-language and you are trying to say so many new words. Every day, it's something new and that's so exciting for us. This stage is SO fun and you are exploding in your development. It is awesome to just sit back and watch you play. But, even better than that is how wonderful it is to just watch you sleep. We don't often watch you close-up because you are a very light sleeper and seem to just be able to feel our presence, but we often just like to stare at you sleeping on the monitor as your roll around like a maniac in your crib. You sleep like your mama, girl! We love going through all the pictures we took each day after you've gone to bed. It helps us feel close to you, even though you're right in the room across the hall. We relive moments from the day by talking about the various ways you brought us joy. We sometimes cry because we can't believe how proud we are to be your Mom and Dad. You bring us more love and more joy than we'd ever imagined possible!

A few minutes after you were born.

The last picture we took before you went to bed on the night before you turned 1 year old. 

We will never be able to tell you enough just how much we adore you. You are OUR WORLD. We are honored to be your parents and we will do anything for you for as long as we live. We pray for your salvation and we hope to live out Jesus to you. You are our precious, precious miracle and we have loved getting to know you this year, as hard as it has been, you have changed our lives and we are eternally thankful for you! Happy Birthday, sweet girl. We love you so very much!

                Love Always,
                         Mommy + Daddy
                         August 25, 2015

A Cheap, Adorable + Super Quick DIY for even the DIY Challenged!

If you're a mom, soon-to-be mom, or even an aunt or friend to a little girl, then you HAVE to try this DIY. It's probably one of my favorite DIY's ever and here's why: I'm obsessed with putting headbands and bows on Emerson. Although, she looks very cute without them, WITH them she just screams adorable. I'm much too thrifty to spend a fortune on bows and headbands. Etsy has some very cute ones, as do other websites + stores, but for more than I want to spend. So, in true Chelsea fashion, I created my own for a fraction of the cost.

I've posted a tutorial on this before, but I have since deleted that blog, so I figured I'd share another (and simpler) tutorial with you guys! I recently discovered that Walmart has a whole rack of $1 bows in every color you could need in the Children's section. Dollar Tree + Big Lots also have a decent selection, as does Target (but they're a little more expensive).

Today I'm going to share how to create a headband using a pre-made ribbon bow for under $5 (or less)! These make great gifts and are super fast + fun to make. They're VERY simple and can be done in under 5 minutes, yes even for those of you that consider yourselves DIY-challenged. To make it even easier for you, I've included step-by-step picture tutorial.

Materials Needed:
Hot glue gun, hot glue sticks, scissors, pre-made ribbon bows (from one of the stores-or even another- mentioned above), elastic ribbon (shown in red), and/or braided elastic (sizes 1/4" + 1/2" used for mine + they're shown in white).

Each container was $0.97 at Walmart

$0.97 at Walmart                                           

The tutorial I am about to share costed me a total of $2 because I had the glue gun, glue sticks, and scissors on hand already. All I had to purchase was the elastic ribbon + hair bow.

Step 1 Cut your elastic to the desired length (you may need to measure your tiny human's head prior to doing this--I just guesstimated) and hot glue the ends together to create a circle (headband).

Step 2 Choose a pre-made bow that you bought and flip it over so that you're looking at the underside of the bow. (Most bows come as a "barrette or hair clip", so I'm going to show you how to remove that and still keep the bow in tact). 

Next, carefully remove the ribbon (you may have to yank it a little bit because it is glued) that is wrapped around the center of the bow in order to gently remove the barrette or clip. 

 If you've done this correctly, you should have 3 separate parts now: the bow, the center ribbon, and the clip (as seen below).

Step 3 Reattach the center ribbon by wrapping back around the middle of the bow and hot gluing the ends together on the underside of the bow. 

Step 4 Using a dab of hot glue on the ribbon headband that you created in Step 1, attach the bow to the headband (I usually glue the bow on the headband where the two headband ends came together so that that part can't be seen once the headband is assembled). 

            

Step 5 Make sure the bow is attached evenly + sturdily to the headband + put that bad boy on your little model and be amazed by her adorableness!

I created a total of 6 headbands today. I used 2 bows that I purchased from Walmart (the plain red + the cherries) and 4 smaller bows that I purchased from Dollar Tree, which came 2 to a pack. I used the white braided elastic ribbon for the smaller bows and the larger red elastic ribbon for the two larger bows. I made all 6 bows in under 20 minutes for a total cost of $7...WAYYYYY cheaper than I could ever buy them! 

Happy Crafting! 

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...

In the beginning it was hard, R E A L L Y hard. It was so hard in fact that I almost gave up about 2 months in. Then, it got easier and easier and easier, until one day it was like magic. Everything leveled out and it was a beautiful experience. I'm referring to breastfeeding. I have been breastfeeding Emerson for exactly 357 days. I am 8 days shy of one whole year. I say that not to boast in any way, but I NEVER thought I'd make it to this point. 

In my life, I've had some pretty great experiences. Like the 3 week backpacking tour I took across Europe with my high school senior class, or the missions trips I took to Peru and Africa throughout my years in high school and/or college. I got a car for my 16th birthday- that was pretty awesome! I met my husband at my best friend's wedding, and then went on to marry him two years later, of all things. Now, my wedding day, that was a spectacular day! It might be my favorite day of all time. It's tied for first with the day of Emerson's birth. Both days will forever be engrained in my memory. 

I will never forget the night I went into labor. Heck, I remember that like it was yesterday. I will never forget the look on Trey's face when he caught a glimpse of her for the very first time. I will never forget holding her immediately after she was born and hearing her cry for the first time. I was shaking, even my voice shook. I couldn't believe that on my chest was my CHILD. Then, there was the first time I ever fed my daughter from my body. It was awkward, at first, then it was amazing. How it was possible that I could produce enough milk to nourish my newborn baby was BEYOND me. It is like NOTHING else I've ever experienced. It was great for the first 2-3 days. Sure, I was sore, but overall I really had a good first experience with breastfeeding.

We came home from the hospital with this little baby girl and suddenly I was responsible for making sure that she was well-fed, and frequently, I might add. Talk about responsibility! My milk came in a day or so after we got home and that's when it started. The immense pain and engorgement was barely tolerable. I had so. much. milk and it hurt! I was ready to quit after just one week. I knew I wanted to breastfeed because it's "what's best for the baby", but amidst sleep deprivation, healing from delivery, AND extremely painful nursing sessions, I was exhausted and the first thing I was ready to give up was nursing. Trey begged me to keep going and to press forward, not in a condescending or mean-spirited way, but he ENCOURAGED me to keep going. He reassured me that in due time it would be well worth it, and that it would soon become a special time for Emerson and I. 

I'm so glad for his encouragement and that I chose to press onward. It's now almost exactly 12 months later, and I can say that every ounce of pain in the beginning was worth it. Every pumping session and middle of the night feed was worth it. Emerson has been weaning herself from nursing for the past few weeks. It's really, really sad for me. I have been holding back tears every night for a week. It has always been our nightly routine for me to nurse her, sing to her and then lay her down for the night. Starting a few nights ago, she would try to nurse, but would get frustrated and begin crying. I would try my best to comfort her, but I couldn't give her what she wanted..."milkies" (as I've called it). That night was probably one of the saddest nights I've had since her birth. It physically hurt my spirit that I couldn't nurse her that night. She just laid in my arms trying and sucking with all her might, but to no avail. I eventually had to give her a sippy cup with milk to calm her. I could no longer sustain her.

My mama heart ached that night. Since then, she has been doing similarly each night...trying and trying, but ultimately resorting to her sippy cup. I know the time is near; the time to stop this ritual that we've created. It has been time VERY well spent. I will never, ever in a million years regret my decision to breastfeed. Some of my sweetest memories with Emerson have happened in the rocking chair in her room where I nurse her. 

Holding onto mommy while nursing

As we slowly say good-bye to this phase of our mother-daughter relationship, I will always treasure the memories made with her during our nursing sessions together. From 10-12 sessions a day, down to just 1 now. I'm holding on to our last morning session as long as she'll have me. I will always remember how she stroked her head as she nursed to soothe herself. I will never forget how she would lovingly stare at me with those beautiful hazel eyes. I will cherish the times she dozed to sleep in my arms after nursing. I will relish the memories of just rocking her while she ate in the wee hours of the morning when all the world was still. I vow to keep the memories of our time together alive, just the two of us,  as long as I live because even though it was the worst of times to begin with, it has ended as the best of times.

You are my Sunshine

You are my sunshine// my only sunshine// you make me happy when skies are gray// you'll never know dear// how much I love you// please don't take my sunshine away.

Lyrics to a very popular children's song (or perhaps it's even considered a lullaby). Either way, a very beautiful rendition of it came on iTunes radio this morning. I was sitting at Emerson's little table playing with puzzles with her when it began playing quietly in the background. As I watched her play, I instinctively began singing along (because it's a song her daddy + I have sung to her since before she was born). Without even realizing it, I was tearing up. As I sat there watching her play, I was in awe of how much she's grown over the past (almost) year. I am amazed by her. My days are often long and tiring, there's no denying that, but moments like this one make everything worthwhile and are a reminder from God, I'm convinced, of why I quit my job to be home with our daughter. 

I know many a friend who so badly wish to stay home with their babies rather than work. While I often envy those that get to go to work everyday and have adult interaction for 6-8 hours a day, I also wish that they sometimes could experience what I do every day too. {This is not to say that someday I won't return to work, but as it stands currently, this is the direction I'm choosing.} Not just for the selfish reason of having them see just how taxing staying home with a child all day actually is (it's a job in and of itself, trust me), but because I wish they could watch their babies like I get to watch Emerson. By watch, I mean it in the literal sense, as in "stare" or "take in". I don't always play with her or interact with her. Though she is definitely attached to my hip more often than not, there are occasional times each day where I like to just watch her play or stare into space or roll around or talk to herself or discover new things. There is no greater joy as a mother than just watching your little babe develop and discover new things.

Just now as I type this, Emerson is sitting at my feet playing with some blocks. She is very content. She occasionally reaches and tugs on my pant leg  + looks up at me with those beautiful hazel eyes. I just smile because she's so pretty. She continues playing with her blocks and books, then randomly stands against the recliner where I'm sitting and gazes at me, then her little arms extend up anxiously hoping I'll reach down and gather her up in my arms, which I do, of course. She sits there with me for no more than a minute or two and we sing and dance to the song playing, then she begs to get down to continue playing. I LOVE THAT! The need for a cuddle, or a smile, or a gentle embrace. THAT is what makes being here day after day worth it. If she were elsewhere, I would have much more time to "be an adult", yes, but I wouldn't get to experience all those little moments that occur simply because I AM here. I love her cuddles and the little glances that she shoots me when I least expect them.

Emerson will be one in two weeks. Y'all, I cannot wrap my brain around that. I swear she was just the size of a little poppyseed in my belly. Her daddy and I were just starting to fantasize about what she would look like: the color of her eyes, the shape of her little hands and feet, about whether or not she would have any hair, and we certainly liked to dream about those chubby cheeks. Now, here she is almost a year later crawling and standing and talking and dancing and trying to sing (be still my heart). She has the most gorgeous features and that curly hair is killing me. She can pierce me with a single tear and her smile, it's to die for. I am tearing up right this second thinking about everything we've experienced together during her first year of life. It's been a rollercoaster of emotions. It's been hard on me, the marriage between her daddy and I, and honestly on my life in general, but amidst all of the difficulties, it's been so very, very worth it. She is truly a piece of my heart walking (almost) around outside of my body. She is growing everyday and it hits me a little more each day that she's becoming an actual little person with feelings, and a very fierce personality. She is becoming more and more independent, and selfishly that makes me sad. Everyday, though she is still VERY attached to me, she needs me just a little tiny bit less. 

I am so thankful for the lessons that she's taught me and how the Lord has used her life to forever change and better mine. I have learned new things about myself (both good and bad) and about my husband through this experience of motherhood. I am so excited to see what the future holds and I pray to God that He never takes my sunshine away from me while I'm on this Earth. I just love her too much. Though, I know that somehow He loves her even more. She will always be our sunshine.